Extending a warm welcome to all those grey hairs knocking at my door.

Big haps in the realm of daycare lately: It seems that Older Son and a certain cutie-patootie in his daycare are requiring some intervention to keep them separated. I am just realising I have neglected to share this, but some time ago we found a note in his cubbie, from the mother of said cutie-patootie, broaching the subject of an off-site playdate. Older Son was in agreement that this was a good idea, so we obliged.

When this little girl started at the daycare a couple of months earlier, she and he hit it off, to the point where on Wednesdays, when he's not daycare, she would cry and ask in vain for him. We of course support having daycare friends, and when connections can be extended beyond daycare hours, we support that too. Now it seems their relationship has grown, and I learned at the dinner table last night from The Lovely Wife that he and she are now being forcibly separated during daycare hours because, and you may need to sit down for this (I was glad I did.): They have an "unhealthy" relationship.

I know. Double-you-tee-eff, right?

I asked for an elaboration, but was given none (she didn't get to dig any deeper with the teacher), so this morning we expressed some concern during drop-off and the following exchange ensued:

TLW: So, what is the issue here? Are they just not using their listening ears* when they're together?

Teacher: Yeah, it's sort of like that. It's not just with those two. When she and he and [another boy] are together, it's the same. They just don't tend to have any interest in any of the other kids.

TLW: And if you separate them, do they play with other kids?

Teacher: Usually, yeah. We're working on it.

TLW: So really, it's just that they're not listening when the three of them play.

Teacher: Mostly. But when [Older Son] and [patootie] are sitting together at lunch, she'll put her legs up and rest them on his lap.

Me: Oh, god. I'm so not ready for this. IS THIS WHEN IT STARTS? THEY'RE ONLY FOUR!

At which point, The Lovely Wife turned me around and led me out of the daycare, rubbing my back and promising that it would all be okay.

AND! AND! This morning, I caught Older Son preening in the mirror, trying to get his hair to "go all spikey."

I haven't caught him scrawling her name into trees, swing sets, and park benches yet. But what could possibly be next?



* Using one's "listening ears" is a great skill to have. It involves actually paying attention to someone who is talking to you. I often want to remind fully-grown adults to try using theirs.

Posted bythemikestand at 10:13 AM  

3 stepped up to the mike:

Lesley said... 10:50 AM, June 04, 2008  

Wooo boy...I remember having those conversations with parents. They are no fun at all.
(of course there is a distinctive possibility that the staff are placing their adult judgements on innocent child behaviour...it happens).

Could have been worse...I've had much more uncomfortable conversations with parents.

And yes, using your "listening ears" is a great skill. So is "using your words" and "using your walking feet".

Steph said... 6:01 PM, June 05, 2008  

Hee hee - preening in the mirror, eh? It does start early. One of the little girls I took care of liked to refer to her hair as "Flippy mermaid hair".

Blame it all on Disney.

; )

Alison said... 7:58 PM, June 05, 2008  

The Boy was engaged last year. They had their flower girls picked out, and were making up invitation lists. then she started school and he stayed at daycare, and the relationship fizzled. Lately, there's a little blonde who informed the teacher that The Boy loves her, cause he kissed her on the face. I'm sure this relationship will also fade when he starts school in September. Ahh, the sweetness of young love...

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